Why are all Museum guests bad listeners?
It says very clearly on the informative information paper to “show up 30 minutes early for your party”. It DOES NOT say “show up as early as you want, we wait around for you people all day”. WHY CAN NO ONE READ? We, your staff show up exactly one hour before you do to set up. When you show up early, don’t whine to us that the room looks empty and not set up. Because guess what? It’s empty, and it hasn’t been set up. BECAUSE YOU SHOWED UP TOO EARLY.
Also, when there is a sign on a door that says “closed for maintenence”, “closed for private party” or the like, that is not an invitation for you to go in anyway and see what’s happening. In fact, we should booby trap the whole place and put up these signs to make examples out of all of you. (At the end of the day, it’s natural selection.)
You know how there are signs that say don’t feed the animals? Don’t. Feed. The. Animals. First off, because you will probably make them sick with whatever nasty straw you are shoving in their faces. Oh, and also because basically every animal we have bites. (Anything with a mouth can bite you!) Most of our animals have been subjected to the ear peircing sounds of your kids screaming non-stop since the minivan doors slid open three hours ago. Even I, a human, I would bite you. (If I wouldn’t get fired and subsequently sent to a psychiatrist for evaluation.)
No comments:
Post a Comment